too muchhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

its a little too much i think. but then again its just me. and that in itself could be the problem; that it is just me. there is no confusion. i know what i need. i know what i want. but i know, as well, i cant have it. for circumstances dictate otherwise. somewhere in an alternate dimension where life took a different turn and existed within different circumstances, i am satisfied because i got what i desired. but just like the existence of that dimension, i am lost.

i feel cold and i mean that literally, spiritually, emotionally, physically, and in every way you can imagine. i guess i got it in a bad way. its gotta to pass someday. its raining. salty drops trickling down. they dry and stick to the surface and i feebly hope for that ray of light to catch the tiny droplets on the edges of this world to shine my life with colours i have long forgotten.

No one knows the future. Anything might lie ahead. All we know is the present. That and the past is all thats concrete. But I choose not to dwell in the past, lamenting on previous errors and crying over lost friends, but rather i live for the present. I live for the very moment that i write this. Not for the moment before it nor for the moment after i culminate this post with a final solitary punctuation. I live for now. How else to make the best of the moment?

Invaded, I have been. I gave up without a fight for i could not want to defend against an invasion so tempting. With that thought i take my leave and fall back into the complicated fabrics of my mind and dream.

Goodnight.

I am back and I am fat.

I am home. Arrived on the 8th of August. And now i realise some terrible truths. I am fat and I dont like it. I can finally understand the pain and suffering the fat people go through. It’s a tough life. I gained 10 kgs while in canada. I am now embarking on a weight loss, muscle gain program which, since it is I who is devising it, is doomed for failure. I will try anyway.

I am gonna be doing lots of aerobics and resistance training. Somebody’s gonna get hurt real bad if it doesnt work and i get the feeling that its gonna be me? Sigh.

Well see this:

This is what fat people do.

 

 PAPRIKAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

Grass Jelly among other strange things… such as me.

( A LOST POST I FOUND!!!! IT WAS SUPPOSED TO BE UP AROUND THE 23th OF JULY IT SEEMS)

What’s the deal with the famous grass jelly drink? What actually is it? Its this brownish liquid thing (grass?) with cubes (jelly?) floating in it. Who wants to drink the jellified grass which is a brown liquid with particles floating in it? Well apparently me. I am not sure why. The drink was just there.

Hmm. Apart from grass jelly i dont really have much to talk about do I? Well lets try talking about me. My economics class is going rather well although i dont understand anything. My teacher must like me. The drama ends in 10 days, culminating in a final exam. Then soon after I will be back in singapore. My happy feet will touch singaporean soil on the 8th of August. A day before the nations birth, Yongliangs birth and the other ones birthday…. eu wei i believe his name is. Nearly forgot that. Haha.

Sadly I will miss the 1st of August – a special date.